* The Blue Whale ejaculates over 40 gallons of Sperm when Mating. Only 10% enters the female. And you always wondered why the sea tasted Salty?!

* Why did the Grammar teacher slap Santa's Son?
B'coz he asked: Why is BRA Singular, when it covers 2 items n PANTIES Plural when it Covers one item?

* Define contraceptive pill?
It's the second best thing that a women can keep in her mouth to avoid pregnancy.

* What do politicians & porn stars have in common?
They are experts in switching positions in front of a camera!

* Tension is when wife is pregnant!
Terror: When girlfriend is pregnant!
Horror: When both r pregnant!
Tragedy: When U r Not responsible 4 both!

* Failure is not when ur girlfriend leaves you... It's only when u leave her a virgin!

* Great door signs:
Gynecologist: Dr Jones at your cervix.
Septic tank truck: Yesterday's meals on wheels.
Plumber's office: We repair what ur husband fixed.
Tire shop: Invite us to ur next blowout.
Electrical shop: Let us remove ur shorts.
Maternity room: Push, Push, Push.

* Man Teases his ex-wife's new husband: So, dude how was the second-hand stuff?
New husband: Not bad.. After the first 3 inches, she was brand new.

* Prof teaching muscle movement, asks a lady: Do you know what your asshole does when you have an orgasm?
Lady: Sure, he's at the office, working!

* Similarity between a dick & matchstick?
Both have heads without brains, both flare up at slightiest friction, both fizzle out after showing valour for 2secs !!!